Lessons from Mel Gibson

"I'm a bitch, I'm a mother, I'm her brother... 
It's a charmer as I volumize my hair, I am not aware." 
- Mel Gibson, What Women Want


A mad scientist friend offers you a chip that would allow you to know what the people you’re talking to are thinking. The catch: you can’t turn it off. Do you accept the chip?   – Daily Prompt

It’s tempting, obviously. But I have a hard time keeping up with my own thoughts and expectations as it is. Peace of mind is a rare and valuable commodity available only to a select few.

I would probably go crazy since I’ve been told on more than one occasion that I am a bit of a people-pleaser. There’s just no way I’d be able to stay true to myself if I knew what every single person thought about the way I dress, talk, walk or even breathe.

Sure, I’d love to know who my real friends are and who appreciates me only when they need help with a project. And trust me, I would kill to know which colleague has a secret crush on me and what my boyfriend honestly thinks about what I’m wearing.

But really, if there’s one great thing life has to offer – it’s spontaneity and a bit of mystique now and again.

I wouldn’t exchange the thrill of not knowing if he’s going to kiss me or not for anything in the world. Or that delicious nervousness you feel right down to your toes when you’re talking on the phone and you’re wondering when your next date would be? Pure gold.

One thing I learned from the amazing (and absolutely charming) Mel Gibson is that uncertainty and a little craziness (okay, maybe a lot of Lethal Weapon-type shit) in your life is good.

Another lesson I learned – this time from What Women Want – is that it is absolutely impossible to understand a person by simply tapping into their thoughts. You know it and I know it. We’ve all done some pretty wonderful stuff which we initially thought were stupid, haven’t we?

The mind runs a commentary on everything and the heart listens, yes, 
 but it still does pretty much whatever the hell it wants to in the end!

We don’t really care what logic tells us. Being reasonable doesn’t mean anything in the heat of the moment. And let’s face it, those times when we acted on instinct alone and threw the rulebook out the window? Those were the absolute best moments of our lives.

And so on that note – I end my rant along with a very inspiring quote from the dashing Nick Marshall :

"What's the difference between a wife and a job? 
After 10 years, a job still sucks."


See ya babes! 😉


Being Kind or Kinda-Being-a-Busybody?

To a lot of people, - myself included - kindness is defined by being 
generous with one's efforts, words or even material things without 
expecting anything in return.

In this writing challenge, we were encouraged to share the details of our last act of kindness. Pondering this, I was thrown for a loop because I couldn’t really say if what I did last qualifies as being kind or plain disrespectful for meddling with other people’s business.

See, my ex-boyfriend was fast getting a reputation for being a stinking womanizer. In fact, even after we broke up and he had another girlfriend, he would still come by and chat me up or walk me to my classes. I was vastly uncomfortable with that and so I told him so. Afterwards, he settled for sending me flirty text messages which I, of course, ignored.

A few weeks later, his girlfriend, Eva – who was also the chick he cheated on me with, sent a ‘friend request’ my way via Facebook. To be fair, she was an acquaintance so I thought it would be rude to snob her. Before long, she started sending me friendly messages and I found she was really quite a nice person, ex-boyfriend-drama notwithstanding. And yes, we became friends.

I found out she hadn’t really known my ex had a girlfriend when he started going out with her. So I believed her and thought, yeah whatever. I mean, I can’t really be mad at her forever and if there was anyone at fault, it was my ex for being such a bastard blah blah…

About a month later, I saw the guy holding hands with another girl at the mall. At first, I thought hey, it’s not my business anymore so I didn’t say anything to Eva, though she told me that night that she has a feeling he’s been cheating on her. I listened but stayed quiet.

The next time I saw my ex, it was at a restaurant and he was kissing a different chick! I was angry, and frankly a little insulted because this schmuck obviously had no respect for women whatsoever. In a huff, I called Eva and told her what I saw. She cried and asked me to come over so I did. We had to go through two pints of ice cream before she could even start feeling a little bit better.

Of course, as I made my way home, I felt a little sick to my stomach for telling her and upsetting her so much. I know this is stupid but it’s just another one of those things you can’t control, I guess.

I have to admit though, I also felt happy and relieved ’cause I thought I’ve accomplished something by helping my friend break free of the dark cloud that was my ex. That was quickly blown to smithereens though, when she told me she got back together with him two days later and yep, you guessed it, he promised to change and be a better man for her.

 I don’t know why I was even surprised when I saw him five days later with another girl hanging off his arm.




Is your favorite color anything but pink?
Do you make a habit of keeping your fingernails neat and clean?
Do flats and kicks dominate your shoe rack?

Like pigs – girls have been herded and lumped into one particular place since time immemorial. Before, it was the kitchen…

Not that I really mind spending some time in there but, boo hoo!

Now, it’s one particular mind-numbing stereotype that makes me grit my teeth in annoyance every single time.

So, 4 out of 5 guys agree that girls:

 are über-sensitive
 cry about the smallest things
 whine about getting sweaty and dirty outside the bedroom, of course
 expect to always be taken to expensive restaurants
 love shopping more than anything else in the world
 turn into jealous bitches at the slightest provocation
 all adore 'chick flicks'
 talk and talk and talk about themselves
 have weird eating habits when they're out on dates
 go out with playboys and jerks in the hopes of screwing 'fixing' them
 crave attention
 all get together to talk about 'feelings and shit'
 nag about weddings and babies more than anything else

Of course there are stereotypes for guys, too – but let’s not go there.

Not today, anyway… *evil grin*

So to give those people who just love to stereotype a slap in the face, I have decided to make a list of what some girls (mainly, my humble self) would do or not do compared to your “average gal.”


 choose 'Gone in 60 Seconds' over 'The Notebook' any day
 not insist on watching romantic movies. 'Lethal Weapon', maybe... 
  'Titanic'? Not so much
 have a lot of fun just staying home doing regular stuff with you
 not constantly ask if they look fat or (God forbid!) 'lumpy'
 rather grab pizza instead of tiny servings of pretentious food
 never take a joke seriously and hold it against you for 
  the next 5-10 years
 not change the way they laugh when you're around 
  (in other words - if you don't like it, sod off)
 say exactly what they mean and not twist it into words only 
  dogs could understand
 not bitch at you for taking too long to text back
 not hesitate to tell you when you're being an obnoxious asshole
 rather go trekking instead of getting mani-pedis
 prefer staying home and cooking as opposed to dressing up for a 
  fancy dinner (most of the time)
 never nag or talk at you 'cause they know what that's like and it sucks
 not bug you 24/7 to 'open up' about everything when that 
  obviously annoys the hell out of you
 not expect you to be 'sweet and perfect' all the darn time 
  (it's a bit sickening really)
 not answer your questions in a completely vague and slightly 
  stupid manner
 never cheat on you with another guy just 'cause he's a better listener
 be okay to just be in the sidelines every now and then
 let you make up your own mind about the relationship in your own time. 
  'Desperate and needy' is NOT a good look for anybody, sweetie.

And there you have it. A comprehensive list of what some girls would  that  most girls wouldn’t and vice versa.

So chickie, are you some girls or most girls?


See ya babes! 😉